Parenting

The human brain is so easily conditioned and, without a word being spoken, the simple elimination of everything except for the “perfect body” in any form of media is enough to instill belief in our young ones that unless they have that desired body, they do not deserve to be seen.

With every 2 AM wakeup cry and biohazard diaper blowout, I waited for that all-consuming love that everyone had promised me, but all I found was exhaustion, frustration, and confusion. All my girlfriends were posting on Facebook about how beautiful their newborns were, how their hearts were bursting with love, and how they had felt an instant connection. So what was wrong with me?

Long story short — she got two staples in her head. But the deeper story is a feeling that welled up in me that needed further investigation. I had this fleeting feeling that she was now damaged because she would have a scar. I remember feeling the same way the day I picked her up from daycare to find out she had a chipped tooth. “She’s not perfect anymore.” Holy crap, where are these thoughts coming from and where do they have the potential to go?

One of the most insidious things that patriarchy does is the complete and utter devaluation of anything that is considered “women’s work.” Not only does patriarchy limit what women (and all trans and nonbinary folk) can do in the world, it also takes what we do manage to do and tells us it isn’t worth anything.

Few things are cuter than the sight of your little boy holding hands with a little girl in his kindergarten classroom, or watching as your daughter puts her arm around a little boy from her tee-ball team. At that moment, parents often assume that what they’re witnessing is young love, even if their child has never had a crush and is just expressing affection. While it may be tempting to call your child’s friend a girlfriend or boyfriend, or to tease them about having a crush, here are seven important reasons to resist.

It is the denigrating soundtrack of a breast pumping session. You, sitting at its mercy. It, just taking and taking.

I had to walk my daughter in the torrential downpour to school six blocks away with a positive attitude, although the last thing I felt was positive. We have to walk because I don’t drive.

Certainly, physical changes are imminent. A rational brain knows this. It all started with chin hairs. I awoke one day and my single, adorable chin hair I’ve had since college multiplied like gremlins. I look like a billygoat. Have you any idea the amount of time I spend a week on chin hair maintenance? Every time my husband walks into the bathroom, I am sitting propped on the counter, magnifying mirror in one hand and tweezers in the other. Or as we like to call it: foreplay.