bodies

I am a perimenopausal woman in her 40s who still feels like a 23-year-old at heart. I cannot stop the progression of time and its effects on my physical appearance, regardless of how youthful my spirit may be.

[CN: diets, not eating (both satirical)] So, you’ve tried every diet out there. You are fed up — and often barely fed at all. The South Beach Diet, The North Pole Diet, The Atkins Diet, The Fatkins Diet, Weight Watchers, Weight Ignorers… The list is as long as your droopy face.

When you’re helping people zip up dresses and watching their reactions to certain items of clothing, you start noticing patterns. Here are four of the phrases I hear most often in the dressing room, and how I wish — oh, how I wish! — I could respond.

We spend a lot of time thinking about our bodies; our faces, our fat, our bellies. We love them. We loath them. This is a tale of ten tummies.

It’s the year of bountiful belly! If you have a flat belly (sigh, it’s something many of us struggle with), consider doing a pizza cleanse.

When speaking with eating disorder victims, what not to say is as important as what to say.

It may be grisly, but by strewing corpses around a field, scientists are able to snag killers and address global human rights abuses.

I discovered the mouthpieces of my water bottles were filled with mold, the race organizers were assholes, and I was tired and needed to pee.