Voices

I reject the insistence that a woman can’t choose what makes her feel beautiful without regard for the judgement of others.

The fact of the matter is that content mills are dangerous and personal essays are a different beast. And there’s a vast level of discrepancy between a phone-it-in XYZ — and a Here’s What It Feels Like piece and other essays, where the language sings and the story is backed up by reportage. I’m aware of this. But there is also a middle ground.

Representation is one of those persistent issues that will always be argued about. However for people of color, queer people, and those who live outside the gender binary, it’s an issue that ties into our identities as a whole.

Men will say they want a smart woman, of course, but the moment they are faced with one; the moment a woman challenges him, or god forbid, proves him wrong, she becomes “hard to deal with,” “too intense” or “crazy.”

The thing is, as you get older, it gets harder and harder to make new mates and maintaining your old friendships can be tricky too. You get busy in your new life, you’re not talking to each other as often, and slowly bit by bit, you start to lose touch. Your friendship becomes a victim of circumstance. Although there have been ups and downs, this is how we’ve learnt to keep our friendship alive.

These conversations are uncomfortable as hell. They can be downright depressing and demoralizing. They may lose you friends and family members. But, sometimes they lead to change, even if it’s small. And being uncomfortable is a small price to pay to help combat bigotry.

Your opinion is not only incorrect, it’s probably also capital-W “Wrong” as in, Right vs. Wrong. We have a cultural problem with opinions. It’s not that everyone has one; it’s that everyone believes theirs is as valid as the next, simply because they have one.