Sex

[CN: sexual assault] No more sex — no touching, fondling… Nada. I was done. I had a new mission: to heal.

One escort interviewed said she was changing $620 PER HOUR for the “girlfriend experience,” which includes taking her to films and walking the red carpet at events. She has a strict 4- and 5-star hotel policy. No yacht parties though, for safety reasons.

The manatees were engaged in a little mutual oral pleasure — or, as the kids call it, 69. Way to go, manatees!

[CN: gender essentialism, birth] Patriarchs, love your orgasms all you like, but don’t fall for the weirdly puffed-up idea that they make babies. Penis power is solely limited to fertilizing eggs. And a fertilized egg is a fertilized egg — no less, no more.

[CN: alcohol] Once we were in her apartment she grabbed me by the necktie, kissed me softly on the lips, told me to take my clothes off, and walked into her bedroom. Her clothing dropped to the ground piece by piece from where I stood to the bedroom — like some sort of Hansel and Gretel breadcrumb situation (if it were less creepy and filmed for Cinemax).

Have you ever wanted to have sex like Gwyneth Paltrow? Me neither, but she has finally turned her attention — and the latest issue of Goop — to telling us all about sex in the Paltrow-verse. I rushed right over and read it so you don’t have to.

This week in Ask #AuntGinger: oral sex. 

30% of girls who took purity pledges experienced pregnancy before marriage. To put that into perspective: only 18% of non-pledgers experienced pregnancy before marriage.