Sarah Zimmerman

Wouldn’t it be nice to get Mother's Day cards from your kids that showed they actually get you? A cards and 15 pounds of good chocolate should about do it.

Do you have a safe word for family holidays? A word that means, “Meet me in the bathroom with pie, cuz sh*t just got real?” You’re not alone.

Here are some real talk, non-cliche baby announcements and invites you can use instead. (Someone should probably check on Knickerbocker.)

If you’re like me, and I sincerely hope you are not, instead of feeling pleased for these women and their success in finding the perfect outfit, you are snarky and suspicious.