Josette Souza

If you feel a visceral positive difference in your life, if you feel a weight lifted off of your chest when you're away from that friend, then that may be the only sign you really need that this relationship isn't serving you and it's time to move on.

And, as I have now recently learned, when you're a formerly-poor, still-sorta-working-class first-generation college graduate of color with a shiny new Bachelor's and an even shinier new full-time dream job at a huge online independent feminist magazine, absolutely no one tells you about the bullshit your former classmates will try to pull with you.

So many children who grow up in broken homes are fed this notion of family that comes with strings attached. We’re told if we can just be pretty enough, smart enough, quiet enough, obedient enough, good enough, then we’ll get the love we crave so deeply, as if family is something that we must barter for.

Given white feminists' continuous attempts at erasing, silencing, and co-opting people of color and their struggles, I can assure you that the gains people of color, and particularly women of color, have achieved up to today have been made in spite of white feminism, not because of it.

I want everyone out there having a miserable college experience to know that it's not your fault, and you're not alone.

While we can't control the range of feelings we may have during this time, we can make sure that we show ourselves the kind of love and care that we deserve.