Man Gets Naked, Acts Crazy After "Accidentally" Doing Meth
Lesson of the day, kids: don't accidentally do meth! Otherwise, you may end up like the poor gent in South Carolina who walked naked into a Walmart store, only to be arrested for disorderly conduct. The man blamed his behavior on an unintentional dose of meth. Because we all know how easy it is to accidentally do meth...
Selfies Banned at University Graduation
Bravo to the brave president of Bryant University, who—for the sake of time—has forbidden students from snapping diploma selfies at graduation. This kind of news story makes us happy to be old, because the idea of an already hellishly long and boring graduation involving every student stopping to fix their tassel, smooth out their hair and snap an inevitably lame selfie sounds like a cruel and unusual punishment, not a celebration. (Selfies, ugh.)
Mall Introduces Slow and Fast Lanes
Brill-iant. In the UK, Sheffield's Meadowhall Shopping Centre has introduced fast and slow lanes to account for the different paces of shoppers. The mall implemented the lanes after getting an angry/kinda adorable letter from a 10-year-old expressing frustration over lethargic shoppers. All us ladies who are fast walkers and/or hate malls and want to get our kale value-pack of pork chops and get the hell out ASAP thankyouverymuch. Let's bring this concept to the states, yes?
Cuba is Running out of Condoms!
In Cuba, demand is exceeding supply when it comes to protected hanky-panky, with pharmacies increasingly running dry (heh heh) on condoms. The shortage has been blamed on everything from supply difficulties with China to new expiration date laws. And while we can't help but admit it's a pretty funny problem (Cubans sure are having fun, aren't they? Wink wink!), it actually has health officials pretty damn worried. Plus, the issue is also affecting those who use condoms for other purposes, including—who knew!—to attract fish and smuggle rum into nightclubs. Oh, condoms. What would we do without you?
Image: Wikimedia Commons
![[M]any doctors aren’t properly educated on matters of sexual health. Image: Thinkstock.](/sites/default/files/styles/profile/public/images/article/2019-02/ThinkstockPhotos-526355961.jpg?itok=qauD1qd9 "[M]any doctors aren’t properly educated on matters of sexual health. Image: Thinkstock.")
