Bachelorette Recap: Rachel Says Bye To Lee, Finally (But Why Alex?!)

Lee is a piece of human garbage, but at least his time on screen is limited, as Rachel finally gives Lee the boot. There’s a dramatic pause, and it’s clear that Rachel is sooo over it... and so am I. Now, it seems as if Kenny will finally get another chance. Kenny — whose hairline is looking raggedy, by the way — is beginning to look both physically and emotionally drained, but he at least he’s not laughing like an idiot the way Lee is. Lee gets left behind as Rachel and Kenny fly off into the sky in the helicopter. Back at the house, an assistant is seen on screen dramatically wheeling Lee’s suitcase out of the room for all the boys to see. I was expecting them to start clapping.

I love Kenny, but he just has to have the last word, and heads back over to Lee. Rachel’s asking about his “short fuse,” and clearly still has seeds of doubt.

Once Lee is gone, Kenny gets that pep back in his step, and so far no blood has been shed, although tears have. Kenny Facetimes with his daughter, and we see him burst into a fit of tears for about five minutes. It seems to be triggered by his daughter saying she misses him and wants him to come home, or it could be a direct result of the abuse he has just survived from Lee.

Poor Josiah is starting to panic because he and Rachel have no connection. He’s totally going home. Cue shots of a vintage classic car outside the manor in Norway. Up waltzes Rachel in this knockout sequined gold dress that's encrusted in pure Hollywood glamour for the next rose ceremony. And the weave is on point, as usual. 

It’s sad because everyone seems to know Josiah is about to get sent home except Josiah. Eric is so dusty. I don’t know how she keeps picking him. Daddy Peter also gets picked next, then the walking flame of hotness that is Alex gets another rose from Rachel. Some dude named Adam who I still don’t recognize gets a rose, and lastly, Matt who has awful hair. Josiah goes home.

The vibe seems to have lightened up tremendously now that “Snake” is gone. But even though he’s gone, Kenny is still sweating over Lee. This is definitely going to hurt him in the long run.

A letter that says “Im c-Open to love” is handed to Eric, sparking a one-on-one date as he and Rachel head to Copenhagen. The highlight of the date is when the two just happen to wander by a field of hot tubs and decide to hop in. I’m wondering if Eric is naked in the jacuzzi only because that other dude definitely was. Rachel looks cute in her little bikini, bandana, and hoops.

I identify with Will, in that, having grown up primarily with white people, I also had that specific “pool” to work with. As a result, I primarily dated white guys. But knowing that had been my dating history and I hadn’t dated outside of one particular ethnic group, I don’t think I would experiment for the first time on national TV.

After that, Rachel and Eric go to an amusement park, then head to dinner. She says she’s trying to get to know Eric, but it feels so late in the game. And then, oh no, we find out Eric has mommy issues and he’s never had love before, but he’s miraculously “falling” for Rachel. Unless both people are going into this blind, nobody wants to date a newb at love when they’re trying to get married. As they continue to spill their guts to one another over perfectly styled cheeseburgers, this conversation obviously ends with a rose for Eric.  

I’m living for Rachel’s brown leather driving gloves and grey beanie combo as she takes the boys on a group date to go sailing on “Viking ships,” medieval rowboats that kind of look like slave ships. But other than that, it’s nice to see Alex’s bulging biceps put to good use. Then everyone gets off the boats and heads to land to joust. I’m super grateful for the slow-mo shots of Alex putting on his viking uniform (although maybe it just played in slow-mo in my imagination). 

Everything seems to be going smoothly until Kenny and Adam end up mangling each other’s foreheads with their shields during their battle, which turns out to be the scene ABC had previously shown to insinuate that Lee hit Kenny. We see the two mildly injured with bloody eyebrows, but no one died.

During the day, Eric and Will have an intimate conversation about who they have dated. Will was the Black guy who was wasting his breath and holding Lee’s hand through racism 101. During this convo, Will alludes to the fact that he typically only dates “white girls.” Somehow, I’m not surprised. He says he’ll make an exception for Rachel because she’s “a catch.” This translates to her being respectable enough for his standards and somewhat of a “science project” to test the waters of a Black woman.

Fast forward to the evening, and I finally remember who Adam is: the dude with the dummy. It seems he has a George Kastanza accent, and I’m totally here for it.

Now Rachel is having a one-on-one during the evening date with Kenny. He looks terrible. He has a 5 o’clock shadow and a Band-Aid over his eye, and I feel so bad for him. He’s having a serious conversation about what’s missing from Rachel. Poor Kenny. He deserves so much more, but he misses his daughter and he just looks stressed out. Rachel does him a huge favor by sending him home.

His daughter is crying, Kenny is crying, I’m crying. This is so emotional.

But on the other hand, I’m screaming because Rachel is swimming in a group of hot white daddies. It’s so weird for me how I don’t even blink seeing a white bachelor and forty identical blonde girls with a token minority on for the past a million seasons, but seeing Rachel and a gang of white guys is such a stark contrast on screen to what we’re used to. There are only two Black guys left, and my gut tells me midway through that they don't stand a chance. There have been clips of Rachel having a meltdown, and the last time that happened, it was because she didn’t want to be judged for not picking all Black male contestants.

Next, we find ourselves on a one-on-one date with Will and Rachel. There are zero sparks, but Rachel is wearing black driving gloves and another adorable beanie with an army green coat and a fur trim hoodie that I’m really into. Some weird Swedish couple who have been together for 35 years walk up, and they kiss.

Rachel turns to Will, hinting that he should mirror this old couple and kiss her back, but he just blinks until she literally has to say “Give me a kiss.”

Things get even worse as they stand on top of a Swedish castle, and Will looks off into the distance dreaming about Beckys instead of talking to Rachel or even paying any attention to her. Copenhagen is more interesting than these two, who seriously lack chemistry. My attention is drawn instead to the excellent set dressing: a copper-plated submarine that they’re having a candlelit dinner near.

Then Rachel does what she does, and “keeps it 100” by calling Will out on his lack of interest in Black women. Rachel knows what every Black girl knows when it comes to Black guys: whether they have a preference for European beauty features or some kind of internalized misogynoir, in most white spaces, when you do find a Black guy, that dude is typically very disinterested in Black women.

I identify with Will, in that, having grown up primarily with white people, I also had that specific “pool” to work with, and as a result primarily dated white guys. But knowing that had been my dating history and I hadn’t dated outside of one particular ethnic group, I don’t think I would experiment for the first time on national TV.

Rachel doesn’t have time to babysit him while he’s figuring out her cultural needs, so she chooses to cut him loose, and Will goes home.

Meanwhile, back at the house, the guys are also all talking about Will’s history of only dating white women. Eric is spilling all the T. Dean confesses he’s never dated a Black girl, and Peter throws major shade by asking if Will is even attracted to Rachel. I can tell by that shade alone (and the hot tub scene from last night) that Peter is definitely no stranger.

Rachel comes back, and we see her looking solemn on a rock along some European river coastline. Chris Harrison appears with remarkably terrible hair (Rachel should bless him with her hairdressers’ info). She struts into the rose ceremony in diamond raindrop chandelier earrings and a long, stunning velvet black halter evening dress. Before she starts, she leaves the room once more in tears, then she quickly composes herself and comes back. She starts handing out roses; Eric already has one from their dinner date, so does Peter.

Then Rachel Lindsay ruins my whole life by sending home that steamboat Alex. If ABC doesn't make him the next Bachelor... this is pure and utter madness. But alas, Eric is still there, and so is Dean, as well as Adam, who carries around a doll, and Peter and Bryan.

These past two episodes have been very emotionally taxing, but I feel relieved that the show has been rid of distractions like the feud between Lee and Kenny.